Colonial Courtship

In the colonial times, many regions in the United States had different practices when it came to courtship. Some areas considered marriage a sacred union, whereas others looked at it as a civil contract. In some communities, marriage between a couple was based on the linking of properties rather than love. Although there were many differences between each area, there seemed to be one universal concept of community involvement when it came to courtships, something that is not prevalent in our age.

The Frontier people, who lived in the more western regions where it was less civilized, based their marriages on an old ritual of "abducting the bride". The groom and his friends would come in and "steal" the bride, often with her consent. Their weddings were fun and crazy events. Puritans saw marriage as a civil contract. Adults strictly watched over the courtships. Before a couple was allowed to marry, Puritan leaders had to approve of the union. If it was passed, a very simple and quiet ceremony would proceed. Puritans were the only group that allowed divorce. In Virginia marriage was considered a sacred union, with a large emphasis on the joining of properties and money. Families were heavily involved. Quakers needed the consent of the entire community in order to get married, and were required to go through a 16-step courtship phase. Lastly, in the south, African slaves married in a "jumping the broom" ceremony, in which the community participated and attended.

-- Kelsey

Dating in the Colonial Times

Written by: Madelaine, Micaela

The concept of dating today was not always how easy and free it was for everyone from 1630’s through 1770’s. They were more restrictions and culturally more laws and proper ways of courting someone. One of the customs from Scotland and Ireland was to steal the bride, but with her consent. The wedding is accompanied with drinking and wild dancing.
And some puritans who were not religious adults have to supervise the couple. One custom was that they used a courting stick to separate the man and his sweetheart the night when they sleep in the same bed. Before marring it was required for the couple to object any marriage issues that they see that is not proper. If there were no objections they would marry a civil ceremony and share a simple diner-no wedding receptions.
In the south many African slaves used the broomstick ritual where the groom and the bride jump over the broom to seal their marriage. And for some like the Quakers, the couples need consent not only form their parents but from the whole community. They go through a 16-step courtship. The Quaker women were known for rejecting the groom at the last minute. Also 16% of Quaker women were still single at the age of 50. Lastly in Virginia they considered their marriage as a sacred. The parents of the couple were largely involved in the negotiations because love was not necessary.
Over the next decades, wedding has been much easier to do. Couples are more impulsive than before and the sacredness of marriage is decreasing year after year.